A powerful High Warden confronts his son’s forbidden bond with a human Rider, only to face an unexpected invasion of chaos, humor, and defiance inside the Crimson Scale palace. As the Council of the Thirteen Courts gathers, tradition clashes with choice.
Possible typo, this line seems to be missing a preposition: "Velara and the boys had turned not into the guest wing [?] the High Wardens and their families"
Interesting start! It seems the two dragons are in humanoid form... shapeshifting? Magic? Or maybe I only think that because they're in uniforms and in the same interior space as humans. Consider clarifying if they have taken human form or simply have a grandiose hall.
The human kids (children or siblings of V?) are amusing, but their impertinence towards the host seems dangerous! A lord of a castle can't brook blatant disrespect, and it seems likely he'd introduce some physical punishment soon. If he continues simply putting up with it he risks looking a fool to his rivals, and maybe the reader.
You are right they are in humanoid form. In my world, dragons' default form is the humanoid form and full dragon form is reserved for ceremonial use or things have gone really sideways and they have to pull out their weapons platform form.
And thanks for the information...I made a small change that might help the flow. And the impertinence is dangerous...or is it?
Hi Lucy, thanks for sharing.
Possible typo, this line seems to be missing a preposition: "Velara and the boys had turned not into the guest wing [?] the High Wardens and their families"
Interesting start! It seems the two dragons are in humanoid form... shapeshifting? Magic? Or maybe I only think that because they're in uniforms and in the same interior space as humans. Consider clarifying if they have taken human form or simply have a grandiose hall.
The human kids (children or siblings of V?) are amusing, but their impertinence towards the host seems dangerous! A lord of a castle can't brook blatant disrespect, and it seems likely he'd introduce some physical punishment soon. If he continues simply putting up with it he risks looking a fool to his rivals, and maybe the reader.
You are right they are in humanoid form. In my world, dragons' default form is the humanoid form and full dragon form is reserved for ceremonial use or things have gone really sideways and they have to pull out their weapons platform form.
And thanks for the information...I made a small change that might help the flow. And the impertinence is dangerous...or is it?